Oops, I did it again

Healing is Infinite

(…and apparently so are a lot of other topics 🤷🏻‍♀️)

(Also, so is my habit of rewording the same life lesson with a fresh quote and a slightly more emotionally evolved tone.)

I couldn’t help myself, I stumbled across a quote that flipped that familiar internal switch. The one that says oi, “Hey, maybe we revisit that emotional topic for the 87th time… just to see if it hits differently today.”

At this point, it’s basically déjà vu with updated language. Honestly, revisiting old themes might be the unofficial theme song of my life.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve read something (well, I could, but the list is long) that perfectly captures what I’ve tried to say, and let’s be real, probably have said, in a dozen slightly different ways. But somehow, it still feels like this time, the words will land better. Maybe clearer. Maybe closer to the truth.

Maybe this time I’ll get it right.

Maybe softer. (But if not, there’s always the next spiral.)

So yes, it’s a sorry-not-sorry kind of post.

This was today’s page post. And the quote that started it all.

And look, it doesn’t matter so much on my social media page, different people are seeing things all the time. But if by chance someone stumbles across my blog and decides to read all my posts in order, they’re probably going to be like,

“Girlfriend… didn’t you say this last week?”

And the answer is yes. Yes, I did. But if I hadn’t come across the quote, I wouldn’t have gone there. So…

Blame Barry. He started it.

Anyway, here’s the new, slightly updated version of a very familiar topic, courtesy of Barry’s wisdom.

Drumroll…

“I can’t tell you how many times I’ve read something that perfectly captures what I’ve tried to put into words. This quote does that.

This is exactly how healing, and writing has felt for me.

I circle back to the same themes often, not because I’m stuck, but because I’ve processed them more deeply. Each time I revisit, I see things a little more clearly, feel them a little differently, and understand myself with more empathy.

I used to think I changed my mind a lot. But it’s not that, it’s that I understand things more fully each time I circle back, with new insight, a gentler perspective, and the kind of clarity that only time brings.

The spiral isn’t a setback. It’s a sign I’m still growing.

I think I’ll spiral back to certain truths my whole life, because sometimes a quote, or just a few quiet words, can spark something new. Well… something that was already there. I just hadn’t found the words yet.

It’s like truth looping back to itself… but wiser each time. Even the things I thought I’d laid to rest, packed away neatly, closed like a finished book, sometimes return to the table.

Not to undo my healing, but to deepen it. Maybe healing isn’t about being done. Maybe it’s about returning, again and again, until what once hurt no longer holds the same weight.

Greeting it with more grace each time it comes back around.”

So that was it. That was the post.

I had to include it here, I mean, it’s my blog after all, but on reflection, it’s opened up a whole other can of worms for me.

It really does make me wonder:

Why do I keep circling back to these same themes?

Is it just part of trying to make sense of it all?

Is there something in the repetition that soothes me?

Maybe there’s still a part of me untangling what happened. Or maybe I’m just seeing things from a place I didn’t have access to before. Each time I revisit, I seem to meet the past with a little more softness. A little more clarity.

So I keep coming back. Not to stay there, but to understand it better. To understand me better.

It’s not like I’m not doing the work. I journal often. I have my healing page. I write this blog. I have occasional therapy. And still, I circle.

Re-examining old wounds. Rewording the same truths from different emotional vantage points.

Apparently, it’s not just a me thing (my pal google tells me from a psychological perspective) it’s a human thing.

Especially for reflective people. For writers. For anyone healing out loud.

I used to think maybe it meant I wasn’t moving forward. But now I think it means I’m still in relationship with my story, not stuck in it, but evolving with it.

Each retelling gives me a chance to reframe, reprocess, or just feel it differently than I did the time before.

That’s not regression. That’s growth with depth.

But here’s where it gets a little messy, lately, I’ve been listening to a lot of Buddhist teachings, which focus so much on letting go, on being fully present, on not clinging to the past. And part of me wonders if revisiting old stories like this is somehow the opposite of what I should be doing.

But maybe it’s not clinging. Maybe it’s curiosity.

Maybe circling back is my way of letting go, in layers.

So if you’ve ever wondered why some of my posts sound familiar but slightly different, now you know.

In great depth.

And rest assured, a little further down the road, I’ll probably find a way to say it all again.

But shorter.

(Probably.)

The next day:

The irony? This popped up in my memories this morning: