We see what we need to…

We judge people for staying in abusive relationships. We’re quick to shake our heads and say, “Why don’t they just leave?”

But then we watch a public figure on the world stage display the exact same behaviours.

Lying, blaming, chaos, manipulation, constant drama, and yet millions defend it wholeheartedly.

It’s the same psychology, just bigger, louder, and more public.

And it makes you wonder what has to happen before action is taken. Because in private or in public, people will justify dysfunction right up until it burns everything down.

The hardest part is realising the behaviours aren’t subtle. People can see them, they just don’t disagree with them. And if someone can watch manipulation and cruelty in plain sight and still applaud it, you can’t help but wonder what that means behind closed doors. What it means for the people around them. What it means about the traits they’ve normalised, or learned to excuse.

Maybe the question shouldn’t be “Why don’t they get out?” Maybe it should be “Why are we so shocked by the patterns in private, when we watch the same cycles play out in front of the whole world?”

So before we tell someone how simple it is to “just get out,” maybe we should ask ourselves why so many people accept dysfunction and abuse without question… as long as it comes from someone they’ve already chosen to stand behind.

14th November 2025

Seems fitting for this to come up today 💁🏻‍♀️