The thought really does count…

“If I have to ask for flowers, I no longer want them.”

When I posted that quote a while back, people got angry. The main argument was, “How will anyone know what you want if you don’t ask?”

I get that communication matters. But for me, that’s not what it was about. It wasn’t speaking to emotional immaturity, it was about emotional awareness. You don’t need to be a mind reader to value someone. You don’t need to be schooled on how to offer small, thoughtful gestures.

It’s about the things that shouldn’t need to be spelled out, kindness, appreciation, effort, the little things that say I see you. It’s not about flowers, it’s about energy and intention.

About people who only do something once you’ve pointed out that they’re not doing it.

There’s a difference between communicating your needs and begging to be valued.

If I have to remind someone to care, it stops feeling real. And when something stops feeling real, I stop wanting it.

I guess it goes back to that old saying, it’s the thought that counts.

⬆️

Today’s page share. Some things sit with me, not demanding another visit, but quietly suggesting, that the initial topic may have been misunderstood. I feel sad for people that feel they need to ask to be treated well, that they should suggest that they would like to occasionally be thought of without prompting. To have even come to the conclusion that to be worthy of those things they must communicate it. To me that feels like gaslighting yourself, convincing yourself that others can’t just be expected to think of you. The amount of things that we normalise rather than accepting them as dysfunction is sad. It’s such a simple word for such a big misdemeanour, to me it’s SAD that people are just comfortably accepting the bare minimum in order to feel loved.