The years go by…

It was my mother’s birthday a couple of days ago. Another missed occasion, one of many, for both of us. Birthdays, holidays, milestones, acknowledged only by silence.

The reality is, neither of us is likely to reach out. And honestly, I’m at peace with that.

I won’t reach out because of what she did. And she won’t reach out, also because of what she did, though I’m sure the story she tells herself sounds very different. But clearly it’s one she can live with.

Sometimes distance is the healthiest choice, a necessity. Protecting your peace and well-being is more important than provisional love. But it doesn’t mean the absence doesn’t sting. It’s a strange contradiction that doing what's right for yourself can still come wrapped in pain, guilt, and grief.

11th May 2025

Both my parents birthdays are close to Mother’s and Father’s Day. I’m not an anniversary dweller, but it is good that the occasions are over together.

It felt fitting to tack today’s post on to the end of this one.