Lonely Men Epidemic…

Today’s page post…

Lately, social media has been flooded with discussions about the so-called “lonely men epidemic.” Headlines speak of a growing number of single men, of emotional isolation, of men struggling to form meaningful connections. And while loneliness is undeniably real and painful, there’s a glaring question that rarely gets asked:

Why aren’t we talking about the why?

It’s not enough to say men are lonely, we have to ask what’s driving people away. Because for many women, queer people, and even other men, the answer feels obvious: emotional unavailability, lack of accountability, resistance to growth, and, too often, entitlement disguised as vulnerability.

There’s a disconnect here. The narrative centers men as victims of modern dating, but ignores how often their own behavior contributes to that isolation. If someone constantly avoids self-reflection, refuses to communicate, or expects emotional labor without offering any in return, is it really surprising they feel alone?

This isn’t about shaming. It’s about honesty. Loneliness is a symptom, not the root problem. And until we start encouraging men to confront their emotional patterns, to unlearn harmful norms, and to do the hard work of change, the epidemic won’t go away. It’ll just get louder….

I know that this post will bring out debate, of the usual kind, the kind that makes me question was it really worth the daring. But my answer of late is yes. I am not anti men, I am anti bullshit. And the bullshit that is being flung around in response to such posts is palpable. Men have created a huge problem, but have decided the answer is to play the role of the victim.

I had an interaction with a man today who posted totally off topic on a gender equality post. He spoke of male suicide, which obviously is a very important issue, but it wasn’t anything to do with the post. However his reply is not something I am used to, an acknowledgment that yes, what I posited is happening. And it was an explanation in very simple terms. I thanked him for his honesty.

These are the interactions and conversations we should be having, not deflection.

Anyways I daresay there will be fallout from my post, but this one simple interaction today gives me hope…